margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize