she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
