My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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