Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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