May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
