Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
