So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Say something about gay babies.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
