And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
My vagina just recognized that song.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
