whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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