It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
