Non-Jews are for practice
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Randomize
