is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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