Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
