We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
