"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
how do you play pong handcuffed?
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Randomize
