I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
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