I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Where did you get a picture of my penis
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
