quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
