Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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