Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
True college students do jello shots in the library
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
