your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
