Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
