just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
