Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
