Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
barbara walters just said penis...
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
