girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
