omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
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