already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
My bed smells like the plague
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
