yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
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