Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
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