Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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