you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I have aggressive nipples.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
