i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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