She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
