You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Randomize
