Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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