Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
