This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
