i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
handjob tips. give me some.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
