everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Randomize
