Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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