Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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