I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
