i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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