I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I deserve this hangover.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
