Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
