I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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