Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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