idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
It was confusing and full of hummus
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
