Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
It's official drugs can't kill me
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
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